Christmas is something you look forward to, congratulations! You are fortunate indeed. If it is something you dread, then empower yourself with specific strategies to avoid the more unpleasant aspects of the experience.
Perhaps the easiest approach is to opt out of the Christmas family cruises. Arrange to visit at another time with awesome christmas holiday packages, when there will be less chaos and fewer people. Present this as a one-year experiment, add some plausible excuses such as work pressures or road conditions, and stick to your guns despite the complaints. Once they have experienced it, other members of your family may agree that a low-stress alternative is a better bonding experience than the traditional holiday frenzy.
Christmas in July is another possibility. It might be a lot easier and affordable for everyone to get together at another time. A nuclear family Christmas will allow some intimate bonding with your immediate family.
If tradition is too strong for you to fight, then resolve to make the most of it. Work out a battle plan ahead of time to maximize your enjoyment of the good stuff and minimize the misery. Talk to a good friend or a therapist about your apprehensions. Analyze the dysfunctional patterns that continue to recur, and rehearse a different response from your usual one if it has not been working well for you. funny christmas sayings
Arrive well-rested, and set limits on late nights. If the house is overcrowded and chaotic, consider retreating to a hotel room. If you have children, make it one with a waterslide and/or other child-oriented features.
Take it easy on the alcohol. It may seem like a handy social lubricant to soften the harsh reality of family togetherness, but over-use will make things worse in the long run.
Have an exit strategy prepared for those times when the celebrations become overwhelming. Take a walk, visit a local attraction, visit a friend, go to a movie or concert. There is no need to be in the thick of things all the time.
Cut yourself and your loved ones some slack. Accept your family members as they are, instead of trying to shape them into what you would have them be. Set appropriate boundaries for yourself and your children, and leave the rest alone. Remember that, in spite of everything, you love those people and they love you. Enjoy your time together as much as you can.
No Christmas will be absolutely perfect, but every Christmas will have some gift to offer. Keep your eyes open for what is good and nourishing, and forgive the rest.
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